During my first year of college, I worked at our school
library’s Special Collections and Area Research Center, where we specialize in
(you guessed it) steamboats. Our steamboat collection “consists of over 40,000
photographic images of steamboats on the inland waterways of the United States,
primarily the Mississippi, Ohio and Missouri rivers and their tributaries.”
More than a few times my job required me to pick through these stacks of old steamboat photographs to see if we had a particular shot of a particular steamboat in a particular place, which is even less interesting than it sounds, I assure you. However, my exploits into the world of steamboats did alert me to a pressing problem: people are very unoriginal in the naming of their steamboats. This creates more work for me because if there are five different steamboats named Queen, then I have to go through five times as many folders to find the right photograph.
Therefore, I have decided to make a list of overused steamboat names so that future steamboats can be spared the ignominy of having a repeated name. You’re welcome, steamboats.
More than a few times my job required me to pick through these stacks of old steamboat photographs to see if we had a particular shot of a particular steamboat in a particular place, which is even less interesting than it sounds, I assure you. However, my exploits into the world of steamboats did alert me to a pressing problem: people are very unoriginal in the naming of their steamboats. This creates more work for me because if there are five different steamboats named Queen, then I have to go through five times as many folders to find the right photograph.
Therefore, I have decided to make a list of overused steamboat names so that future steamboats can be spared the ignominy of having a repeated name. You’re welcome, steamboats.
What Not to Name Your Steamboat:
(These examples are names of actual steamboats.)
- Anything with “Queen” in it
-
Queen
-
Island
Queen
-
Queen of
the Mississippi
-
Queen City
-
American Queen
- Anything with the Name of a City in it
-
Cincinnati
-
City of Parkersburg
-
City of
Owensboro
-
City of
Alma
-
City of
Alton
-
City of
Baton Rouge
- Anything with “Belle” in it
-
Belle of
the Bends
-
Belle of
the Coast
-
Belle
Vernon
-
Bayou
Belle
-
Belle
Creole
-
Belle of
La Crosse
-
Exception: Belle
of the Golden West (because Jacky Faber is an exception to everything)
- The Name of a State
-
Wyoming
-
Indiana
-
Alabama
-
Alaska
-
California
-
Colorado
- A Girl’s Name
-
Susan
-
Anna Lee
-
Sarah
Edenborn
-
Elsa Marie
-
Betty Jean
-
Grace
Devers
-
Elizabeth
Awesome Steamboat Names:
(These examples are completely made up.)
- The Name of Your Favorite Lord of the Rings Character
-
Samwise
the Brave
-
Gandalf
the White
-
Peregrin
Took
-
Lady Galadriel
-
Legolas
Greenleaf
- Any Spell from Harry Potter
-
Alohomora
-
Diffindo
-
Expecto
Patronum
-
Riddikulus
-
Wingardium
Leviosa
- Any Color plus Any Mythical Creature
-
The Violet
Phoenix
-
The Silver
Centaur
-
The Amber
Nymph
-
The Puce Gargoyle
-
The
Lavender Leprechaun
- Awesome Alliterations
-
Dangerous
Dave’s Dinghy
-
Ray’s
Rusty Rig
-
The
Beastly Barge
-
Vanity Vessel
-
The
Courageous Craft
- Names in Foreign Languages
-
Don
Quixote (famous Spanish book)
-
Amore
(Italian for “love”)
-
Kuroshitsuji
(Japanese for “Black Butler,” good manga)
-
Monsieur (that’s
all the French I’ve got)
-
Wienerschnitzel
(German deliciousness)
I hope this post has assisted all of the people who I know
are struggling with the naming of their steamboats. I wish you luck. Please don’t
take too many pictures.
On an unrelated note, I have only read ten books so far this
year, which means that I must admit an early defeat in my goal of reading
fifty. I still have hope for reading thirty-five books though, since the summer
is young and that’s when I read the most. With busy friends and not enough
hours at work, I should have plenty of time to read and (hopefully) to blog. No
promises!
PS - I wanted to include a couple steamboat
photos in this post, but I’m not allowed to do that because the images “cannot
be copied or reproduced without the permission of the University.” Instead,
please enjoy this picture of an alligator with a turtle on its head that I saw
in Florida.